The Story of the Milwaukee Monster as Told by Lionel Dahmer

A Review of “A Father's Story” written by Lionel Dahmer, father of Jeffery Dahmer.

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The story of the “Milwaukee Monster” has suddenly resurfaced due to a Netflix limited series created by Ryan Murphy and Ian Brennan following the life of Jeffrey Lionel Dahmer, an American serial killer and sex offender who committed the murder and dismemberment of seventeen men and boys between 1978 and 1991.

Evan Peters stars as Dahmer in this series.

Even though it was horrific to watch, the show piqued my (long) interest in true crimes and my desire to gain knowledge about the psychology of serial killers.

So, I went on a hunt (sort of) reading all I can about the issue and watching YouTube videos, short documentaries and footage from the court hearing in 1992. Then, I found out that Lionel, Jeffrey's dad, had written a book called A Father's Story after watching an interview he had with Oprah.

I sought to find the book and for hours (after I got an ebook copy), I couldn’t stop reading. I read it throughout that night.

The opening of the book titled “Part 1” immediately broke my heart. It read:

Though the Netflix series does a decent job of humanizing the monstrosity that was Jeff's serial killing, the book adds a depth that is missing from most other accounts—it is the story of a “father who, by slow, incremental degrees, came to realize the saddest truth that any parent may ever know: that following some unknowable process, his child had somewhere crossed the line that divides the human from the monstrous.”¹

“A Father’s Story” gives us perspective into how families of perpetrators of such serious crimes feel and the trauma they go through, knowing that their blood could do something as grotesque as that, whereas most narratives focused on the families of the victims.

Reading the book, I realized that it was heartbreaking being in the position Lionel was in—wondering what could have gone wrong while you parented a “monster”, asking yourself what signs you missed that you shouldn't have, wondering if you had done anything differently, maybe your son wouldn't end up being a psychopath who lured men into his apartment, drugged them, killed them, and then dismembered, dissolved their parts in acid and ate other parts.

The book doesn't seek to justify his Son's actions; it's merely born out of a genuine desire to ask questions and, hopefully, receive answers.

Lionel spends the majority of the book searching for a narrative he can believe in, one he can embrace, and one that will give his son some sense of humanity as he couldn't recognize the man he saw on the news or at the prison when he visited.

It was easy to feel remorseful for everything that may have been with Jeffrey after looking at the many images of him as a newborn and young boy that were included in the book. And that's one element of the book. It gets you to sympathise. Not with Jeffery Dahmer nor the crimes he committed but with his lost potential. With the young “Jeff" who got lost along the way and got replaced by an unrecognizable monster. With the sweet innocent adolescent “Jeff” who started discovering things about himself that he didn’t understand nor could he speak out loud and so had to battle it out by himself until the darkness overpowered him.

The fact that Lionel does not attempt to justify or rationalize his son's behaviour sets this book apart and makes it likely worthwhile to read. He's just looking for some serious, forthright answers. In any case, he never succeeded. Since no one explanation can satisfactorily address the crucial question of "what went wrong?"

Nonetheless, it was quite a ride journeying with Lionel in the search of these answers and with the hopes of getting tips from him on how to know when you are parenting a monster.

My heart goes out to all families of victims whose trauma has been awakened by the new Netflix show.

1. Wikipedia